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REOCCURRENCE

eavedrop
 

My head’s floating,

holding things I dread

my home is spinning

freezing, is this the end?

 

Cuz I’m 

Surrounded by things I hate

But they’re the things that I need to feel safe

 

is this a way to escape?

my reflection always seems to shift its shape 

Sitting on the tiled ground

like a baby I got fingers in my mouth

The hanger for these clothes

feels so euphoric cuz I’m in control

 

Can’t see clearly, I need some eyedrops

I hate the way my mirror eavesdrops

(On my body again)

indulging in the chorus of my insides

Applauding me in ways that make me wonder how i’m staying alive

 

So deluded, putrid

What a mess

I’ve been drowned in,

smothered in shapelessness 

Cuz I’m 

craving the taste of bliss 

just like the flavour of self discipline 

and so I self-isolate

from everything that could disrupt the pace

Even if I lay down

The dizziness— dizziness tangles up my tongue

the other day my heart was

on the verge of simply giving up

 

can’t see clearly, I need some eyedrops

I hate the way my mirror eavesdrops

(On my body again)

indulging in the chorus of my insides

Applauding me in ways that make me wonder how I’m staying alive

 

I’ve been giving you my entire being

Can they hear it too? What ur doing to my heart beating

I’ve dedicated my time and motivation 

Just to lose myself to this toxic relationship

Yet I can’t stop handing you exactly what you’re wanting

 

So tell me why I

can’t see clearly, I need some eyedrops

I hate the way my mirror eavesdrops

(On my body again)

indulging in the chorus of my insides

Applauding me in ways that make me wonder how I’m staying alive

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